change

moon eye numb1

A Solstice of Self

Today I experience a second rebirth. A rebirth of the alignment between me and my higher self and my origin self.

I see the old parts of me wash away as though they are an ancient civilisation. That is what they have been likened to. I keep waking up with and just generally feeling energy running through my palms. I am realigning.

The part of me that did not know who she was, who lived in fear of her own self and emotion… she has been laid to rest. The tethers that bind are no more. This I know, today.

This process of realignment with the higher consciousness is one of such intangibility and of an undefinable nature. I want to write about it yet when I go to find the words it is as though they are wisps of air… no words for no definitions do fit this.

unicorn girl asleep
I am so much more me today than I ever have been before. It is as if I am more whole. My words have a congruency to them they did not before. My soul, my air, my breath has a wholeness, a depth to it that I did not have before. And as stated, I do see this image in my mind once again… of the being that is or was me…now an ancient site of ruins, it can be learned from but not lived in.

I do not think it coincidence that this occurs on the Winter solstice. The day where the sun sleeps her longest night only to renew herself for the foreseeable future. She, like me, is transforming into a new self, her whole self… she is realigning and returning to the days spent as MORE herself. MORE Sun. I am grateful for her arms of light that I saw today. It has been a dreary week. But as I have felt myself take new breaths today, so has she, it seems. I do not think this alignment coincidence. We, the beings upon the Earth, We the beings within this Galaxy, We share the same cycle. We are cyclic in our states of renewal, rebirth, home and travel.

Today I decided to sit outside in the flickering rays of sunlight and channel something from Asteria (my higher self/Pleiadian self) to do with the Winter Solstice:

“It is of no coincidence that I am reborn again today. Many times I had rebirth. Many times I have shed.

Today is a day for the sun to shine as she does, if only for a short while.
When she rests she will wake renewed and replenished tomorrow, as do you.
She will be ready to start anew, as will you, and so you shall. It is not long for the Winter to pass new, not long at all.
As you go about your day and return to the bounty that Winter’s harvest has brought you, be reminded of all that you have and give thanks. It has been in chaos that we have found stillness and still the sun shines to you, just for you.
The Earth requests nothing but your respect for her bounty and your harvests this Winter. They are hers to share and yours to keep. Cherish them.
Become One (with her, the Earth, and also yourself) and you will always be full.”

– Asteria

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fairy butterfly

Fuck it.

Fuck it.

Fuck ever doing anything that is not in alignment with my highest good.
Fuck ever being anything that is not in alignment with who I truly am.
Fuck ever saying anything that is not in alignment with my highest truth.
Fuck ever being anything or anyone other than my soul.

All that matters is the spark of life in you and that it shines as brightly as it possibly can.

When you be or say or do anything that is not of your soul, your light dulls. All that fucking matters in this life is letting your unique, individual spark of life shine as brightly as it can, as brightly as it should. It’s natural state is to be permanently bright and luminary. It is dulled when we walk in shadows of resistance to who we really are.

So BE WHO YOU ARE in EVERY waking moment.

If you feel like shit, don’t force yourself to go to work because of societal pressure or fear about money. Yes, these are very very real concerns that are of course terrifying but there will come a point when you would rather your light shine brightly homeless than be dulled, dressed in a suit and tie. This point, when it comes, is unique to all. But there can always be the hope that we will align with this way of being without coming to a dramatic point in our life but rather, hopefully one day, it will simply be our way.

If you want to stay in bed all day, stay in bed all day. There is a reason you feel like this is what you need to do at this time. If you stay with this, it will eventually flow into something else, then that will flow into something else, then that will flow into something else and so on and so on, with the magnetic pull always flowing towards what is best for you at this time, what will bring you into alignment with the true brightness of your light.

How you feel matters, in every waking second your emotions and feelings are your exact instruction for what will bring you closest to your true light, the fastest. If you have to, treat your emotions like they are the teacher and you are the student. Listen to them and head towards the next thing that feels one step better than before, as they so often guide us to, and you will learn that they can be trusted to draw you to what you had been seeking all along, and eventually, hopefully, you will learn that you are them, the teacher, and they are the student, you are each one another, you are one and the same.

Don’t you see? Everything in this life is an illusion. It is an idealised perfection by someone else’s mind that you are now trying to become. The truth is only in you and you write it in every single moment of your existence, every breath you take, you are making the decision to either commit to or deny the illusion. Let yourself be free and think of what is best for you. If the illusion brings you comfort and joy then by all means experience it’s depths to the nth degree, the furthest reaches that you can. Exhaust the perspective and experience of being in, behind, below, beneath and within the veil but when it is time to leave, do not run, do not stay in a place you have written away with your most recent breath. You are done with that, you are done with the beauty and the pain that it held for you to learn and grow within. You are now beyond that and you are freer than ever before. You are not shackled, you are not in chains, you are just feared. You are feared by you because of the magnificence you know that you can truly be. It will shock and enthral you and you will lose every sentiment of the illusion that you held inside of you to be true. To relieve yourself of the burden of the veil is not one that is done easily most often, because you are not even aware that it is a burden until you step away from it and say, ‘ah, I feel so much lighter. I shine so much brighter. Could this have all been a dream?’ You will feel newness for the first time and fresh and as a child once more. It is terrifying to be a child, to be in that state of innocence and faith in a world that has taught you that it is safest to be the exact opposite. But in reality it is not to be feared, this child like state, for it is a state of strength and of great earned and learned wisdom over years and years. You cannot notice who you have always been if you did not first experience who you never truly were (the illusion). Take heed and know that now that you are free no one can stop you from being this great, effervescent, luminary, unstoppable, unbreakable, untouchable LIGHT of pure beauty and joy and most of all, FREEDOM.

spiritual art prayer

A Channeled Message from The One about Change and Time

Lately I have been feeling weird, blank and low vibrational. I tend to mentally beat myself up when I get like this. I feel like it’s not okay for me as a spiritual teacher or intuitive being to fall into low vibrations. I often feel as though I will be thought as less than or that my material will be devalued so I tend to just get mad at myself when I feel negatively focused.
But. That is part of what is changing at the moment.
The new wave of spiritual teachers or beings’ way is to be authentic. Authentic in sadness, in joy, in strength, in weakness, in loss, in faith, in lost and in found.

So below is a message about that^ from the group consciousness I channel known as The One… It is also about the changing of ‘time’. In the last little while my feeling of time and linear time has been disintegrating… subtly, but it’s there. It has felt strange and weird and chaotic to me… So this message holds some answers about that too.

So, this is a message that began as more of a personal message to me from The One, but it applies to all of us and goes on to share important information:

“WE are here with you now. It is okay to be a dreamer, to be a sun.

Sometimes the saddest stories are the ones we write ourselves.

WE are with you in your darkest times.

It is okay to not always see the light. It is okay to not always smile. There is yellow in the sun but not everyone sees the same colours. To some, all looks gray. All appears dreary and rainy with no sun at all. It is okay to be in the shadow of loss, or loss and love, and chaos and dichotomy. It is okay. Go where your feelings take you and you will find the rainbow at the end of it all. But first you must allow and receive, not take away from yourself through anger at yourself for feeling lower vibrations or what you deem as lower of vibration.

You are a child of the god or universal energy. You are a god of universal energy, the universe itself, you experience all arrays of all emotions including sadness and sunlessness and sunshine and loss and scouring the echoes of the past for reasons that no longer exist…? This happens too, but we deem it as okay. You should deem it as okay. It is what makes you, you (the learning from it).
Humans are so very caught up in what is and what is not, how things should be versus how they are not but listen when we tell you: it is time for change and growth and with that we must do away with all judgements and all precursors or pre-knowings of situations, assumptions, yes… Assumptions about what you think must be done in certain terms and situations based on the past. The time for change is now and with the changing of time comes allowing of the new. Allow the unsurety. Allow the hierarchy to fall. Your rules no longer apply in the now, in the newness of the now, the real NOW.

There is so much time and you always think you have so little but there is always time because time is a duality purposed construct that is FALLING AWAY at this time. It is falling and it is only seemingly chaotically. It is not actually because the chaos is in non-linearity itself.

You were not actually a linear creature before you came here. You were sewn into the earth to follow progress with the time and the turn of the sun’s shades and the earth’s spin, the dress of the illusion of time (as we have stated before), but now, you as a flower (this flower of time), that time is done. The time is ripe to fall from the tree and grow again. You sought so much for this. You sought so much and sought and sought. It is time to stop seeking and to turn away from all that you knew and begin to CREATE NEW. The rules are out the window. The chaos is gone; you just enhance it with your addiction to the rules themselves. Let no one stand in your way in the doorway of your newness. You are a whole, complete creator. You are the Earth as she turns and the soul in the stars as well. You are the ALL. And so it is.”

– The One

Featured Image: Devotion by Nik Helbig

http://nikhelbig.com/art-blog/

lyndsey vu illustration

Raw, 2015, Rebirth

I feel very raw. I feel like I have been stripped down to the foundations of my life as I know it. I can barely explain it aside from sharing the visual I keep seeing that exemplifies my feelings:

I see my body, standing upright. It has been excavated like an archaeological dig site. There is not much left but the foundations of what was once a golden temple. I see my body as this shell, filled with dirt and vague structural pieces, evidence of what used to be. I feel neutral towards it. I only somewhat recognise it as my own. It sounds awful, because it is mine and I should be worried about it, but I’m not. I am very slightly curious towards it. I wonder what used to be. I don’t really remember.

This is 2015. This is where we are right now. We are standing in the shell of what used to be, or that emptiness is headed your way. It’s alright. Everything old is being removed to make way for the new. The new is beautiful, green and lush. It just takes it’s time. The sun sets over it beautifully. I see it. Purple and pink skies with bold orange and yellows arching together, blending softly to create something we’ve never seen before.

Each day we are reborn a little more.

meteorite space

Featured Image ‘Rose’s Portrait’ by Lyndsey Vu

girl water dress

Water

I have found so much peace in the recent realisation that:

a) There is no actual truth, only agreed up on consensuses about each facet of reality.
b) Uncertainty is not a sea you have to drown in, but a place where you can float and await the happenings of your life with patient but eager curiosity.
c) I choose my beliefs, I choose my truth. I choose it through feeling and waiting to see what happens next. Then like water I change, adjust and flow wherever I need to, wherever I want to.

emily balivet

A Month of Chaos, I Find Me Still

I feel like I’ve been drowning and like things have been a crazy and intangible tornado spinning all around me and I haven’t been able to touch anything. Nothing feels still. Everything spins around me and I have watched it spin so fast until it simply crumbles into poetry and a sea I felt I would surely drown in. But I’m somehow still here.

I think, this month, I have learnt and am still learning how to swim in chaos. The technique is simple: Don’t. Don’t even try. Because as you frantically paddle around and try to find a rock to hang onto or to touch the ocean floor you’ll find nothing there but more water. After all the trying and finding that nothing is there, the exhaustion hits and you realise you are going to drown. And so you go, you do.

Except you don’t. You float.

And it’s so surprising it scares the hell out of you for a moment, because you aren’t touching anything and everything is still falling, the tornado is still spinning all around you, but you’re floating and still and free. It barely makes sense and there’s nothing you can do. You can’t make sense of it.

I am in the eye of the storm and I can’t make sense of it. But this is how I feel.

I feel like I am floating in the sea of the intangible nothing.


Last night I felt a shift in my consciousness and I wrote about it on a spiritual forum, querying others of their perspective on it. Someone wrote that we are amidst the shift of ‘The Becoming’. I agree. I am conscious of myself amidst myself BECOMING something MORE.

At present I am under the impression that my higher self holds the name, Asteria. I tend to get caught up in names when it comes to my guides. I am just very word-y, language orientated, so I’m always after words and names. It is also why I am predominantly claircognizant. It’s all words words words and less clairsentience etc, (though I am improving with that, slowly but surely). Anyway, because I want to know so badly, sometimes the information that comes through is a bit muddied. So let me preface this by saying I am 90% sure that Asteria is my higher self name. Regardless, I feel some kind of connection to that, and I wonder if I am BECOMING her more… but it would be rather, that I am RETURNING or being REBORN. It sounds over dramatic but at present there’s no other way of explaining how I feel. The name Asteria does feel familiar to me, it feels like a memory.

Edit: Also, I will just add here I think it might be Asteria OR Aurora due to a bunch of other synchronicites and messages. As I said, it gets a bit muddied. And it doesn’t matter that much anyways. It is just nice to have a name as reference point for when I am talking to her (this higher self me is simultaneously a spirit guide for me at present).

Anyway, Asteria is the greek goddess of the stars and was born from chaos. So too was/am I.

Asteria is the Greek Goddess of the stars, prophetic dreams and necromancy. She is one of the Titans and daughter to the God Coeus and the Goddess Phoebe who were both original Titans born from chaos. Asteria is known for reading the stars (astrology) and prophetic dreams. She and her husband, Perses, God of destruction, are parents of the Goddess Hekate.
 
There is a myth involving Asteria in which her body becomes the creation of the island Delos.

Asteria was fleeing from the God Zeus who was sexually pursuing her. She transformed into a quail and threw herself into the ocean to get away from him. It was then that the God Poseidon pursued her and the quail she became then turned into the island Ortygia (quail) which later became known as Delos. It was there that her sister Leto, seeking refuge from the jealous Hera, gave birth to Artemis and Apollo. Asteria is sometimes referred to as Delos as the island was originally named after her. In myth it is said that this island fell from heaven like a star.
 
It is said that Asteria was a dream Goddess worshiped on her sacred island of Delos. She is known as the oracle of night and sends prophetic dreams. She is also said to be a Goddess of falling stars as well as necromancy. She dwells in the realm of night amongst the stars and dreams and also among the dead. Her daughter Hekate is also a Goddess of night, the dead and necromancy. Call on Asteria when reading the stars, before sleep and to communicate with spirits.” (http://loveofthegoddess.blogspot.com.au/2013/08/asteria-greek-goddess-of-stars.html)

I feel like I fell through the storm, was reborn out of the chaos and now I am an island.
(Featured Image by Emily Balivet)

courage quote

Knots, Mess, Life, Courage and Change

I feel like everything is going crazy.

– It’s already February 21st. How the hell did that happen?

– 2 arguments in the same day with the people closest to me recently. Only 1 of which is resolved.

– Psychic abilities advancing (can hear my guide more, see much more clairvoyantly – see this post if interested in reading more).

– Friends fading in and out of my reality. Painful first then I release, then they’re back, then they’re gone. Then they’re back.

– Final shedding of past relationships pain – to a degree. I still carry the tears and scars I am unable to face yet. But there is definitely some kind of detachment also happening.

– One of my kitties got sick. He’s fine. But that’s never happened before.

– I feel like I am connecting way more strongly to my higher self. This has led to many life improvements due to increased inspiration and moments of motivation. E.g. Random inspiration to start playing guitar again, wearing more floaty, pretty clothes (I know that sounds superficial but it truly isn’t – clothing can represent who you are inside), improving my diet (buying more organic food, reducing wheat/gluten intake, reducing the amount of sugar I eat – with hopes to eventually have none in my diet – definitely have a sugar addiction going on but this is the first time I have felt very strong, motivated urge to try to kick it), cleaning and updating my house a bit more, reduced chemical medication, improved mentality and increased motivation towards my business goals. I’m being inspired to help others more even beyond my own business. Just…in general. Openness and willingness to connect and try to help others heal themselves.

– I am in some kind of weird never-been-like-this-before stage of fearlessness – no, rather, I am being courageous: I am terrified of many things but I am doing them anyway. My guides have always told me that I have ‘fortitude’. I feel I am really conscious of how that is at the moment, and that the level has increased.

– Letting myself feel my feelings more and more.

– Trying to understand and utilise the benefits of being very sensitive.

The thing that makes it all seem intense and crazy is the fact that it’s all been very close together.

Ultimately, I think my overall vibration/frequency is increasing at a rapid rate. Things are being released painfully, beautifully and new things are being born perfectly.

Exciting things are on their way.

(Or at least, it is what I am trying to believe. I choose my beliefs. I am.)

I wrote this status thing the other day and I think it sums up what I’m trying to express:

“Life is a fucking mess. Like, that’s actually what it is. Life is this unexplainable, messy, chaotic, beautiful, insane, ever changing nonsense experience. So much can happen in a small amount of time. Even when it looks as though nothing has changed, the tables and chairs have all been thrown around the room by unseen, volatile forces and you missed it because you blinked, but then you’re in it. Life is a fucking wonderful, painful, shining mess.”

Meanwhile, my guide, Sahasrara, says to me (with images of knots in a rope joining to more of the same):

“Everything ties together perfectly. Everything will tie together perfectly. Everything will be alright.”

My conclusion:

“Even the things that look like knots in your life are just the bridges that bind together, to create perfect life.”

Time to Allow

From my perspective, it has become apparent that it is time for some people to decide who they are. Are you someone who allows or are you someone that resists, in the face of the unknown?

Are you someone who can see the beauty in the sharing of honest experiences? Experiences and personal truths that are made up of spiritual, paranormal and unusual events…these things being shared, even at the risk of ridicule?

Or, are you someone who chooses to ridicule the sharer, ultimately because you fear that others having these experiences may mean that the world is in fact changing.

But it is not your world, it is their world, it is their reality as they know it that it is changing. It is time to realise this.

Their changing days do not have to become yours. If you react negatively, it is from the belief that you do not have the power to keep your reality the way that it is any more. But realise – you always do. Everyone’s reality is different. This has always been the case and it always will be because we do each have our individual power. It can never leave you because it is you. You are the power that creates your world and you always will be. I am the power that creates mine and I always will be. It is time to realise this, it is time to allow.

Rebecca Town

I keep waiting because I have faith.

I have faith. I have faith in people. I have so much faith in people, to my own detriment.
I keep waiting for people to change because I believe they can, I KNOW people can. But they have to want it, they have to believe it first.
And they never do and they don’t and they won’t.

I keep waiting for B to realise…and to realise that things do get better.

LIFE CHANGES. It is the only constant. And the fact that life changes means there is both good and bad and why am I the only one who takes note of the good?

I wish I lived in a world where everyone knew that anything is possible. I wish more people believed in second chances…for me, for themselves, for the world.

Everyone’s in pain and you can find a band aid if only you try.