courage

courage quote

Knots, Mess, Life, Courage and Change

I feel like everything is going crazy.

– It’s already February 21st. How the hell did that happen?

– 2 arguments in the same day with the people closest to me recently. Only 1 of which is resolved.

– Psychic abilities advancing (can hear my guide more, see much more clairvoyantly – see this post if interested in reading more).

– Friends fading in and out of my reality. Painful first then I release, then they’re back, then they’re gone. Then they’re back.

– Final shedding of past relationships pain – to a degree. I still carry the tears and scars I am unable to face yet. But there is definitely some kind of detachment also happening.

– One of my kitties got sick. He’s fine. But that’s never happened before.

– I feel like I am connecting way more strongly to my higher self. This has led to many life improvements due to increased inspiration and moments of motivation. E.g. Random inspiration to start playing guitar again, wearing more floaty, pretty clothes (I know that sounds superficial but it truly isn’t – clothing can represent who you are inside), improving my diet (buying more organic food, reducing wheat/gluten intake, reducing the amount of sugar I eat – with hopes to eventually have none in my diet – definitely have a sugar addiction going on but this is the first time I have felt very strong, motivated urge to try to kick it), cleaning and updating my house a bit more, reduced chemical medication, improved mentality and increased motivation towards my business goals. I’m being inspired to help others more even beyond my own business. Just…in general. Openness and willingness to connect and try to help others heal themselves.

– I am in some kind of weird never-been-like-this-before stage of fearlessness – no, rather, I am being courageous: I am terrified of many things but I am doing them anyway. My guides have always told me that I have ‘fortitude’. I feel I am really conscious of how that is at the moment, and that the level has increased.

– Letting myself feel my feelings more and more.

– Trying to understand and utilise the benefits of being very sensitive.

The thing that makes it all seem intense and crazy is the fact that it’s all been very close together.

Ultimately, I think my overall vibration/frequency is increasing at a rapid rate. Things are being released painfully, beautifully and new things are being born perfectly.

Exciting things are on their way.

(Or at least, it is what I am trying to believe. I choose my beliefs. I am.)

I wrote this status thing the other day and I think it sums up what I’m trying to express:

“Life is a fucking mess. Like, that’s actually what it is. Life is this unexplainable, messy, chaotic, beautiful, insane, ever changing nonsense experience. So much can happen in a small amount of time. Even when it looks as though nothing has changed, the tables and chairs have all been thrown around the room by unseen, volatile forces and you missed it because you blinked, but then you’re in it. Life is a fucking wonderful, painful, shining mess.”

Meanwhile, my guide, Sahasrara, says to me (with images of knots in a rope joining to more of the same):

“Everything ties together perfectly. Everything will tie together perfectly. Everything will be alright.”

My conclusion:

“Even the things that look like knots in your life are just the bridges that bind together, to create perfect life.”

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Bravery – It’s You

I do think that it is often the unseen acts of bravery that are the most courageous… And I’m not talking about someone saving an old lady from getting run over by a bus and no one was around to watch or something, no.
I’m talking about being real, being true, being authentic, being who you really are. That sort of inner, miraculous feat that no one really realises is happening except for you.
If at any point, in any day, of any moment of your life, you find that you can say, ‘I allowed myself to feel how I felt’ or ‘I didn’t let them change me’ or ‘I got out of bed today even though it hurt’ or ‘I believe in myself’ or ‘I will try’ or any statements similar (those ones that bring a bubbling, quiet joy, a singing feeling of self satisfaction, to the surface – if you’re honest with yourself about it, if you realise what it all means)… It’s YOU. I’m talking about YOU. YOU are courageous. YOU have fortitude. YOU are brave.

You know what, I actually think it is really brave to even exist, too. Life is beautiful, wonderful and so ALIVE. Sometimes, too alive. Everything, every moment is fragile and just as precious as the other one. Every single moment is constantly disappearing. There are no take backs, no second draws. It’s like the whole thing is just…we are all taking a HUGE risk with every breath we take – moment by moment we reaffirm our commitment to life and living it, even as each of these moments (these which make up our life, our very existence as we know it) shatter behind us.
And every second, you’re propelled into the next moment whether you asked for it or not…the one you were in is disappearing, so you just, you gotta go, you HAVE to keep moving, lest you disappear too.
So, truly, if you are still breathing here today, if I were wearing a hat, it would be off to you.

heart brave quote

 

 

What People Think and the Journey of Finding Oneself

I just read a blog by one of my favourite spiritual teachers, Teal Scott (AKA The Spiritual Catalyst). It was all about having the courage to stay true in the public eye, and not reacting to slander. It applies to our day to day lives as well. My experience in my life is one example.

Though there wasn’t/isn’t much drama, I still had my qualms about ‘coming out’ as an extremely spiritual individual. I know a lot of my old ‘friends’ (I don’t actually know if we are friends any more or not in their eyes, meh) think that I have lost my mind. My mum and brother are very uncomfortable with who I am because they are both Christians. I used to be a Christian until about Year 11 (age 16) when I left my old, very small Christian school and went to a large Anglican school. I was there for the duration of the HSC, so years 11 and 12. Though it was an Anglican school, most of the people in my grade were not Christians, just people at a Christian school. Because I was not encompassed by a circle of close, Christian friends in a Christian orientated environment, I…I am not even sure what happened, I’m trying to think of how to put it…Did I purposely release myself of Christianity? Did it just fade away? I’m not being philosophical here, I just can’t remember haha! I suspect that must mean it faded away…Anyway!

After high school I just sort of chilled out and worked for awhile before moving to Wollongong to live with a friend, and eventually started going to a College that was part of the University. It was there that I made friends with a very passionate Athiest, whom we shall call T.
T and I became really good friends and almost started dating. In amongst that, we were constantly having debates and discussions about the nature of the universe and ‘god’ etc. I wasn’t Christian at this stage but I believed in something, a god, I think, but not the Christian concept of who god is.
Eventually he had be convinced that there was nothing, that we live and die…y’know? …For about a day. But then I realised the nagging feeling of ‘there must be something more!’ meant that there WAS/IS something more/I should at least keep searching. He didn’t get that, oh well. We were still awesome friends for awhile.
free your mind
So I kept searching and thought about it on and off.

Then I went to TAFE to study Animal Studies Ceritificate II where I found a book on Spiritual Animal Communication in the library. I got so excited and then from there read everything I could on the subject, mostly over the net, then started teaching myself to do it. And I found that when you start reading about these intuitive abilities, you get connected to deeper spiritual ideals just by being on that path. So I ended up devouring like, every spiritual book in the library and probably half the ‘spiritual section’ of the internet.
Then I found running themes (that already resonated with me, I ‘just knew’) within many spiritual ideals – I found that all of the ‘new age’ and ancient beliefs are fundamentally connected by these foundational truths (and probably more I can’t recall):
the universe is interconnected
consciousness IS the universe
energy and vibration are the basis of the creative universe
what you give to the world, you will receive from the world (the ‘Law of Attraction’ – not karma!) There is no masculine god figure that dictates our lives, only we can control our lives
There is only ‘now’
We are creative, divine and eternal beings

Discovering these things allowed me to discover myself (more than I already had) and learn what my higher purpose is in this life – just to help, help all beings, in any way that I can (which is why my list of services are so broad). I always knew that I wanted to ‘help the world’, ever since I was young(er) but now, I know HOW and know the WHY which enhances the passion and inspiration I already felt. And NOW, Here I Am. There I am. I am who I truly am.

People think I am crazy, I have lost the plot, I am in some kind of cult mind programming, I am gullible and/or think my ‘powers’ come from ‘the devil’.
BUT I have fortitude (my guides have told me this phrase several times when I have been feeling low).

I don’t respond to people who are ‘just asking questions’ but who obviously want to start a debate/convince me of their truths. If people want the information I hold, or advice from my perspective, I will happily share. I want to share but only when I think it would be helpful to others. I won’t encourage others’ insecurity about themselves and their beliefs by allowing them to attempt to ‘disprove’ mine. I see no benefit in battling with others at all, especially when I have already battled myself (and the conditioning I was brought up in I.e. Christianity). I think people see this as a sign of idiocy, like I should constantly be challenging my truths. Not that I don’t think it’s beneficial to do so if you feel inspired, but only if you feel inspired. But it should never be because other people are scared they are wrong about their own beliefs, and so convince you to engage with them.

I think what the majority of people who try to start a debate with me are really dealing with is fear. They want to know that what they believe is for sure and certain. But no one can give you certainty but yourself because everyone will always have a different opinion, because everyone has lived different lives and gone through different experiences that have shaped who they are and how they view the world. There is no objective reality, there is only the one you create for yourself.

Knowing who you are and staying true to yourself is a beautiful thing to do, as opposed to than doing anything but.