moon eye numb1

A Solstice of Self

Today I experience a second rebirth. A rebirth of the alignment between me and my higher self and my origin self.

I see the old parts of me wash away as though they are an ancient civilisation. That is what they have been likened to. I keep waking up with and just generally feeling energy running through my palms. I am realigning.

The part of me that did not know who she was, who lived in fear of her own self and emotion… she has been laid to rest. The tethers that bind are no more. This I know, today.

This process of realignment with the higher consciousness is one of such intangibility and of an undefinable nature. I want to write about it yet when I go to find the words it is as though they are wisps of air… no words for no definitions do fit this.

unicorn girl asleep
I am so much more me today than I ever have been before. It is as if I am more whole. My words have a congruency to them they did not before. My soul, my air, my breath has a wholeness, a depth to it that I did not have before. And as stated, I do see this image in my mind once again… of the being that is or was me…now an ancient site of ruins, it can be learned from but not lived in.

I do not think it coincidence that this occurs on the Winter solstice. The day where the sun sleeps her longest night only to renew herself for the foreseeable future. She, like me, is transforming into a new self, her whole self… she is realigning and returning to the days spent as MORE herself. MORE Sun. I am grateful for her arms of light that I saw today. It has been a dreary week. But as I have felt myself take new breaths today, so has she, it seems. I do not think this alignment coincidence. We, the beings upon the Earth, We the beings within this Galaxy, We share the same cycle. We are cyclic in our states of renewal, rebirth, home and travel.

Today I decided to sit outside in the flickering rays of sunlight and channel something from Asteria (my higher self/Pleiadian self) to do with the Winter Solstice:

“It is of no coincidence that I am reborn again today. Many times I had rebirth. Many times I have shed.

Today is a day for the sun to shine as she does, if only for a short while.
When she rests she will wake renewed and replenished tomorrow, as do you.
She will be ready to start anew, as will you, and so you shall. It is not long for the Winter to pass new, not long at all.
As you go about your day and return to the bounty that Winter’s harvest has brought you, be reminded of all that you have and give thanks. It has been in chaos that we have found stillness and still the sun shines to you, just for you.
The Earth requests nothing but your respect for her bounty and your harvests this Winter. They are hers to share and yours to keep. Cherish them.
Become One (with her, the Earth, and also yourself) and you will always be full.”

– Asteria


Feeling Tone: Who You Are

In one of the books I am currently reading (“The Nature of Personal Reality: A Seth Book” by Jane Roberts), there is an exercise you can do to ‘feel your feeling tone/s’ … it’s basically’ close your eyes, centre yourself and notice what you feel about who you really are, what you really are…’ It is a method of feeling your soul and the truth of your miraculous being-ness.

I wrote down my impressions:

“I am limitless.

I am the hair and the muscle. I am the wind that transpires outside. I am the gentle heart I feel here.”

“I am the outstretched universe.

I am the music of the trees, I am the song in the wind, I am every frequency.

I am the length and the distance of the Earth.”


“I am a/the one love. The one song.

I am the home and the house.

I am the centred sun.”


universe quote

Notes on Spirituality 2.0

My Notes on Spirituality 2.0 by Teal Swan

Spirituality ‘101’ is: To move towards positive feeling emotion because it = empowerment, helps you to understand that you can create your reality. It is external movement towards what you want.

Spirituality ‘2.0’ is: Quit going anywhere. Sink into your pain…move beyond wanting AFTER getting that sense of empowerment.
Wanting is moving away from yourself or something, or feeling etc.
Wanting is designed to get you away from something you don’t want to feel.
Wanting is a movement that propagates suffering = GRASPING.

Note that you can’t cause someone to not want what they want – teach people to get what they want first – not that they shouldn’t want and going about teaching them how to not want.
Beyond wanting = beyond self abandonment.

Walk into the eye of the storm instead of walking away via wanting – you will find you become undone – you become what you really are…then there’s nothing to suffer from. Suffering is caused by the resistance to the thing you’re avoiding or experiencing etc. It is not caused by the thing itself.

101 = Allow yourself to go in the direction of joy.
2.0 = Allow self to feel – go into the pain.
101 = Change thoughts to change your life = empowerment.
2.0 = Don’t change one thing b/c that attempt to change says “This is not okay. It is not okay to be how I am, or feel how I feel.”

A note on crying = When you’re in alignment with the truth of this universe, crying is a natural release b/c if there is anything in you that is not in that high vibration of the universe, it needs to leave, and it does so in the form of tears. And/or the other form of crying  = appreciation, unconditional love…the overwhelming depth of this universe and all of our beauty…I think when you feel that, being in human form is suffocating and tears are literally you spilling out of yourself, for me, anyway.

We don’t come into life naturally resisting anything. E.g. Negative emotions/experiences. We’re educated into it via socialisation.

101/2.0 is the expansion of the universe (/you), the extension and then the inversion, back to oneness, back to you.

Any time you’re trying to feel better, you’re abandoning yourself. Go into the storm instead (if you can, if you’re ready for it – for 2.0). Trying to make yourself feel better is fracturing you. You’re abandoning that piece of yourself. It is here we often say, “I’m only going to be with myself when I feel good”.
2.0 = Wholeness, oneness with the self – Be with self anyway, even when you don’t feel good – don’t bail. You wouldn’t do that to a friend, don’t do it to yourself.

Give yourself what you need. Quit trying to feel good just so people will love you.
All we want is to have someone be present with us, anything other than that invalidates our feelings.
Being present regardless of the emotions…of the conditions…of anything and everything… = unconditional love.
Being with self, with no conditions = being present = being in the now (I.e. being the now.)

The now is an automatic by product of being with yourself, not something you seek. You can only be in the now by being, not doing (I.e. reaching for it, aiming for it, trying to place your finger on ‘the now’).

Everyone has PTSD ha, so true.
It (PTSD) is the suppression of something (a feeling created by an experience) you ran from – something you didn’t allow to integrate.

I think 2.0 is just a different method of healing…or, it is healing in it’s real and pure form, rather. It is healing via acceptance instead of action (wanting –> changing).
Just being = no more suffering b/c of no more resistance to the self and whatever your life is, and whoever you are in the now.

The Life Of A Catalyst

I am definitely a catalyst!

Andey Fellowes

There are those of us who have incarnated here on Earth, who carry a certain frequency. This frequency has such strength that it generates a response within those who are exposed to it that brings about a shift of awareness and thus a large change. Some aren’t ready for this change, some aren’t ready for this awareness of themselves and so they close off, resort to child-like behaviour or even go on the offensive and get outwardly destructive. And some, who are ready, flock to this vibration like a moth to a flame knowing, on a molecular level and deeper, that exposure to this sort of frequency will mean the shedding of the old and the experience of new.

Teal Swan Teal Swan

There are many names for this vibration and those who carry it. The most apt, I’ve heard is the ‘Catalyst’ energy. This Catalyst energy is a vibration which I…

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Staying with a Negative Feeling

Recently I discovered that I am meant to be a channel for the information coming in from the Pleiades. It makes me feel a bit weird, not sure why. I think I’m having a small identity/self esteem crisis… “Ahh, go away, not again!” says my mind. The wiser half responds, “Let’s deal with it now. Go into the story, into the pain and you will come out the other side in a better state.” So here we go…

I have been feeling so over all the shadow and the bullshit and all the waiting for life to start really happening.
So, I am doing this. I am ready. Throw it at me. And if we have to, let’s throw all the shit at me now, first, okay? So that I can get a free load for a while, right? Okay? Cool.

Back to the issue at hand:

It’s like …I’m a Pleiadian…but my ‘human self’ is insulted that I am to be a channel for some other cooler being with cooler information. But, (and here I realise) I’m not just doing that. I am holding my very own Pleiadian frequency that is anchoring the planet down and projecting it upwards, like a spring release, but in slow motion (the raising of consciousness on this planet is, and must be, steady and slow, but at the same time comes with an exciting, propulsive and energetic feeling).
But again, this is making me feel like any information that I might have to offer is not considered as important or ‘as good’ as this/these other beings’ (whom I am to channel). …But… (and here I realise again) It is the collective. I am a part of this collective. What it is, is more like – I’m to raise my vibration to meet these beings and share the information through my perspective (plus I know I’m already doing it in my dreams). We are meeting half way to transfer information that was/is already mine, just inaccessible from here in 3D.
My human experience still allows me to do what I love which is to counsel, offer advice and share my perspective in whatever manner that most helps the individual. This human part of me + the Pleiadian part of me…they’re already interplaying, even without me realising it.

I am constantly transmitting that frequency and that noise (song) to the Earth. I am constantly changing the way of the world and the realms at this time; it’s just a matter of being more conscious of it this time. I’m going to begin. It’s time to begin.

Now, is where I begin and (the) Now is where I dissolve. (And revolve).

I feel better. I’m glad I got that out. Sometimes (maybe even a lot of the time), instead of listening to my fears or worries like this, I ignore them and try to ‘delete’ them by refocusing on something positive…and that IS the thing to do, but only AFTER one has been through the negative-feeling thoughts.
If you run away from negative-feeling thoughts, as I do at times, they will simply return at another time. Instead, go into it. You will find it is far less difficult/scary/painful/exhausting/etc as you may think, and that all these ‘negative’ feelings have their opposite – beautiful, positive insights…they’re almost always born from the difficult, aren’t they? Hmm.

Quote: Emerson

What I must do is all that concerns me, not what people think. This rule, equally arduous in actual and in intellectual life, may serve for the whole distinction between greatness and meanness.

It is the harder because you will always find those who think they know what is your duty better than you know it.
It is easy in the world to live after the world’s opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; But the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.

Emerson – Self Reliance