spirituality

emotions image

Fight or Feel?

A lot of our pain comes from resisting our emotions. The fact is that YOU FEEL THE WAY YOU FEEL.

You can try to erase and/or force changing the feeling to a different, more positive feeling but this either perpetuates the strength of the feeling and it’s pervasiveness (when you focus on what you do not want (the feeling) you get more of what you do not want (the feeling) – this universe responds to focus only. It is not responsive to ‘want’ vs. ‘don’t want’, only focus), making it pretty much impossible for you to change it or erase it OR if you do manage to change or erase it (by running away from it, by resisting it), the feeling is suppressed, not truly gone.

This feeling that you do not wish to feel, that you have suppressed will then come up as an intense over reaction to something that triggers that same feeling at a later date (and could also manifest as illness or a point of attraction for negative experiences that will force you to feel that feeling once again).

It is okay to want to change a negative feeling to a positive feeling. It is not okay for you to do this by force because of the aforementioned consequences. You can only truly move past a negative feeling by allowing it to BE, allowing yourself to FEEL it. You WILL find that when you face it and feel the feeling, it will pass and it will naturally TRANSFORM into a more positive feeling state on it’s own.

Resistance is a dire disease of the human race at this time. Our negative emotions are not our enemy. They are our signals that we are not in alignment with what is beneficial for our highest good. They are signs that will lead you to your greater joy if only you allow them to be as they are and transform into the beauty they are intended to become.

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cat girl art

Things I think People think about Me

I find this really emotionally soothing for some reason.
I realise some may be wrong, and some are right.
Maybe it’s because I have the inner conflict I think a lot of us do, “I don’t give a fuck what others think! I am confident, I believe in myself.” but also, “I do care”. I think I hold resistance to the idea of caring, and say to myself it’s not okay. But I am learning more and more that we are a sea of contradictions, it is part of what makes us these conscious complicated beings. How could we be any other way? We are all these messy balls of thoughts and feelings that interact with one another, entwining ourselves more and more. You can fight the knots or realise that you can’t stop them, you just need to try to accept them, together. And even if you never do, accept that too.

Although this may appear as a negative thing for me to do, I am telling you this feels cathartic…resistance release, I think. And it’s all kind of funny, so here we go:

The things I think people think about me:

whoa she talks to animals she is insane, you can’t talk to fucking insects SCIENCEBIATCH
rose tinted glasses are her middle name
way too honest TMI
how can she just confess her weirdness to everyone so easily
okay this girl is insane
I don’t get this girl at all
pretty cool hair man
sweet tattoo man
oh it’s a bit crooked man
(apparently one time someone said I was) kickass for not giving a fuck (about what others think relative to my spiritual self, truths, abilities, beliefs etc) (YES!)
omg vegan sheisjudgingmesheisjudgingmeiheartmymeatdon’ttakeitawayyy
way too obsessed with taylor swift
animals are not THAT great
internet addict
well I started talking to her because I think she’s hot but now I’ve realised she’s a new age hippy I feel the urge to run and warn others, and also check out her blog to see if she’s written about me (because I’m sure she was analysing me psychically the whole time we were interacting)

ursula disney gif

How people see you once you tell them you’re psychic

brave/crazy for being friends with her exes
no friends nelly
hunchback
crazy cat lady
financial disaster
get a real job already hobo
doctor who is not THAT great
doctor who addict (in a ‘that is not cool/weird’ kind of way)
pretty cool that she reads comics
pretty cool that she digs reddit and gets internet memes
pretty cool that she likes x-men and other marvel stuff
Note: ^ seems to be mostly guys’ reactions
such a contrasted person
/reads blog/site – oh she seems to think she knows everything
omg starseeds? aliens? being spiritual is one thing, this is just ridiculous shit, wut
getting pretty sick of her repeating ‘you should only do that which brings you joy’ or ‘only do what feels good’ or saying ‘i didn’t do it because I intuited it would not bring me joy’ (I heart my life quotes anyways you guys, you’ll benefit from it in the end 🙂
she really needs to ‘do’ more (these people don’t know of my inner power, knowledge and ambitions – I’m changing the world via example, I’m even changing you [or rather inspiring you to change you, to feel joy] and I’m not afraid to believe it, most days anyway)
she makes me feel like I’m not crazy, that thing that happened was more than coincidence/I do have abilities/I doubt myself less
if she can get over bipolar disorder, I can survive insertsituationhere
since she had bipolar disorder, she will understand, I feel like I can tell her things
oh god she has bipolar she is insane and is going to have a breakdown on me
dear god I hope this bipolar person has taken her meds she will surely burn my house down otherwise
this is a really understanding and non-judgemental person
this is a really open and curious person, an attractive mystery
I’m so glad she just told me all this stuff about her, now I feel better about me and my shit
funny in an ‘off’, random and intensely sarcastic kind of way
howdoIsocialwiththiscreature
(I think sometimes maybe people think) she has her shit together (I don’t)
why does she live in her pyjamas doesn’t she feel weird that’s kind of weird
who owns eight doctor who shirts yo who does that man
pls stop talking about your cats
pls don’t make me look at more photos of your cats
why does she use two c’s in ‘Becc’ (I don’t even know how it started, it just did, sometime in kindergarten)
i think she’s a witch pls don’t turn me into a toad

I thought of a thing to summarise:

I don’t need applause approval.

Helping Others in the Midst of ‘The Machine’

I have been dreading going to these Centrelink (Australian government department responsible for offering financial support, help getting work and probably a bunch of other things I’m not aware of) ‘work skills’ workshops that are mandatory to attend if you want to continue receiving financial benefit.sepia human spirit photo

The concept of attending these gave me so much anxiety in previous months that I couldn’t bring myself to go and thus stopped getting my much needed fortnightly payment. Fortunately, I was then able to get a medical certificate that allowed me exemption from participating in these workshops for the following month. But after that month, I was supposed to have my shit together and therefore be capable of going (I must highlight the fact that when I get anxious, it’s not just a bit, it’s always a lot. I was diagnosed with ‘Generalised Anxiety Disorder’ a few years ago).

And it sounds so silly but the anxiety surrounding this is a deeper issue that is not immediately apparent upon superficial observation… For me, it was about feeling like I’m being forced to become a ‘cog in the machine’ that is society and the government etc. plus deep seated authority issues that I have had since school – another place where I felt forced to do things I didn’t want to do. And the whole thing with all that is probably something about it threatening my sense of individuality and that it promotes a feeling of powerlessness, due to the feeling of being controlled by others and what others say I have to do.

Anyway.

So last week, I finally went to one of these workshop things. Before I went, I was dreading it but had come to terms with the fact that I did have to go and so started thinking of ways that I might be able to survive it. I thought to myself, ‘maybe it won’t be that bad’, ‘maybe I’ll meet someone who loves Doctor Who or someone who is into spirituality or metaphysics I.e. maybe I’ll make a great friend’, ‘maybe the information presented will actually benefit me in some way’.

Well, I would never have guessed how it turned out.

There was only 2 other ‘students’ and the trainer and I in attendance, so there was a lot of time to get off topic. We were doing this (lame) thing where you ‘get to know each other’ – the aim being to prove that you will find you do have things in common with the people you end up being around in the workplace, and in society in general, even if it doesn’t initially seem like it…or something like that.

It was going okay. The other two people were very talkative and just asked like, ‘do you like music? okay we have that in common /writes it down. do you like blank? okay, yes, /writes it down.’ and so on. The trainer was making some suggestions too and she asked if people like reading and what kind of things do we like to read… Well, I was asked directly so I said, “I just read a lot of non fiction about metaphysics and spirituality, mostly.” And the trainer looked surprised and was like, “Oh wow. That’s so interesting, I really like crystal healing and stuff like that…”
Soon after, “do we all like animals?” “yes”, then went off topic talking about our pets. The trainer and I got into a funny conversation about our cats and weird stuff they do.
At another point we were asked about ultimate career aspirations. I said that I want to finish my book on metaphysics/bipolar/my life and become known enough to make money from spiritual writing, blogging and energy healing to just do that stuff full time. Then the trainer asked me about how energy healing works. I explained about how I do it and what the aura is etc.

From all that, somewhere in there, topical conversation drifted to the concept of consciousness and god. Oh, that’s right, I think the trainer said that she believes in karma in the traditional, Buddhist view (it sounded like). So then we talked about consciousness more and I spoke about how I communicate with animals. The trainer then told me that she felt like she could actually talk to her cats, and kept saying, “I know I sound crazy but -” I was like, amazed, and so glad I was there to tell her, “You are not crazy.”

She then told me (well, everyone) a story about how her previous cat asked her a question one day: The cat: “If I go, how should I go?” (as in die, like what would be the least upsetting way)
Trainer: “Oh, probably getting hit by a car or something. Something quick.”
And then apparently a few days later, the cat got hit by a car. Now the trainer was tearing up at this point and expressing how she felt guilt relative to that conversation, and like it was somehow her fault that the cat had died. I told her that, no, this is not the case. The cat was clearly planning to leave regardless. I also told her that she may have a natural gift for animal communication and should look into it. She clearly got that message correct.
And I also told her that she could hire a professional animal communicator to have a conversation with her deceased cat and that it might be comforting for her.

cat joe

My cat, Joe, who died. A beautiful soul.

She kept saying how grateful she was to hear that and that she would research it all when she got home. I also gave her a link to my site so she could order energy healing if she wished, as she had expressed interest in ordering some in the earlier conversation.

A very similar thing happened in 2012 when I was interviewing for a job at a call centre. I was discussing my past education, on that list being the course I did in Animal Communication. The interviewer asked me what that was so I explained. She started talking about animals, how much she loves them and feels a strong connection to them. I shared some stories about my cats and that I too (obviously) have a very strong connection with them. She then went into talking about when she got her dog euthanised. She was expressing extreme guilt for doing it because she now wonders if it was not the right thing to do. She started tearing up. I explained that the animal always knows, or the higher self at least always knows, and that we all do the best we can from the perspective we are in that moment. Her love for her pet was clear and that her dog’s journey had simply run it’s course. She was crying at this point. I told her that there are plenty of animal communicators that will speak to her pet for her and that doing some research into it might be a good idea also.

The point is, that I went to this ‘work skills’ thing with a bit more of an open mind and attitude, and turns out someone there really needed me to be there, to say that to her. I was able to help someone in a profound way. And it was just amazing. It is miraculous, these sorts of meant-to-be interactions…they happen in the most surprising ways.

People think they are so alone in their experiences when they’re just not.

You are not alone.

You are not crazy.

You are not responsible for the death of your pet.

Animals are conscious creators just like us, they are often infinitely wiser than a lot of humans I’ve met and are much more connected to their greater soul-self. So, when an animal leaves, you can trust that some part of them knew and they knew that it was right.

P.S. Hank is a conscious creator. Vote for Hank 🙂
cat senate

Feeling Tone: Who You Are

In one of the books I am currently reading (“The Nature of Personal Reality: A Seth Book” by Jane Roberts), there is an exercise you can do to ‘feel your feeling tone/s’ … it’s basically’ close your eyes, centre yourself and notice what you feel about who you really are, what you really are…’ It is a method of feeling your soul and the truth of your miraculous being-ness.

I wrote down my impressions:

“I am limitless.

I am the hair and the muscle. I am the wind that transpires outside. I am the gentle heart I feel here.”

“I am the outstretched universe.

I am the music of the trees, I am the song in the wind, I am every frequency.

I am the length and the distance of the Earth.”

 

“I am a/the one love. The one song.

I am the home and the house.

I am the centred sun.”

 

universe quote

On Happiness

It is important to remember that the journey to find happiness will always seem never ending because the happiness you’re looking for is within the journey itself. You are not really on a ‘journey’ at all. You cannot ‘achieve’ happiness because you already have it. It is always there. You just have to notice it.

Rebecca Town

Quote: Prof. Jerry Waxman

There is a fundamental reason why we look at the sky with wonder and longing—for the same reason that we stand, hour after hour, gazing at the distant swell of the open ocean. There is something like an ancient wisdom, encoded and tucked away in our DNA, which knows its point of origin as surely as a salmon knows its creek. Intellectually, we may not want to return there, but the genes know, and long for their origins—their home in the salty depths. But if the seas are our immediate source, the penultimate source is certainly the heavens… The spectacular truth is—and this is something that your DNA has known all along—the very atoms of your body—the iron, calcium, phosphorus, carbon, nitrogen, oxygen, and on and on—were initially forged in long-dead stars. This is why, when you stand outside under a moonless, country sky, you feel some ineffable tugging at your innards. We are star stuff. Keep looking up.

Prof. Jerry Waxman from NYU

I have always known this. We stare in awe at the vastness and beauty of nature…because we are it.